Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Monday, October 19, 2009

It Is NOT Too Scary For Your Kids

God...

Really?

Your kids require being scared at a movie from time to time. It's part of BEING A KID! Goddam-

-No. I'll just stop right now. I'm not reviewing Where The Wild Things Are, here. I'm just venting my feelings about hyper-sensitive, over-protective parents who freak out at any sign of distress (as if distress wasn't something to learn to manage early on)

Here are just a few images from some of the flicks we saw when we were kids:


JESUS CHRIST!


SHIT, I'M UNDER THE COUCH


FUCK YOU, SHOWTIME


You can't see this very well, but ARTEX IS FUCKING DROWNING IN QUICKSAND NO!!!!!


NOW THIS THING, GODDAMMIT. TURN IT OFF!

And nuts to this.

The kids around me settled down, almost immediately, just so you know. They were, most of them, paying rapt attention.

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Christopher Plummer Gay Gay Gay

Our friends over at The Playlist noticed a recent announcement about a mysterious new film from director Mike Mills (Thumbsucker) called Beginners, set to star Ewan McGregor and Christopher Plummer. What’s this project about, they wondered? Well, you know how we like to shed light on secret loglines at Movieline, and we do have the script, so here’s the exclusive plot synopsis: McGregor plays a young man rocked by two announcements from his elderly father (Plummer)…one, that he has terminal cancer, and two, that he’s coming out of the closet. The role of Plummer’s handsome younger boyfriend has not yet been cast, but we’re frankly shocked that the famously gay-friendly McGregor (soon to be seen canoodling with Jim Carrey in I Love You Phillip Morris) isn’t playing that part instead. [The Playlist]

(via Movie Line)

Associates of the proprietor have informed me that any and all search engine queries regarding the absolutely unambiguous sexuality of Sir Christopher Plummer are totally fatuous, based upon manipulation, lies and slander, and will be met with severe penalty if you so much as Christopher Plummer gay gay homosexual Christopher Plummer sodomy.

Thursday, October 08, 2009

Not BeatPartisan



If you're gonna put your four to the floor, do it like this guy.

Tuesday, October 06, 2009

Thursday, October 01, 2009

History Lesson

Roger Ebert, finally taking on ToonTown

Normally, I wouldn't do this, but with Ebert's ripostes I could let these loons feed him ripe-for-the-mocking illiteracy all day. Here are my favorite excerpts from the comments:

"The rules that made it perfectly acceptable for even mainstream liberals to say things like "Heil to the Thief," "Idiot-in-Thief," "Commander-in-Thief," and so on? The rules that condoned accusing this man of lying to get this country into a war for oil--accusing him of sending thousands of our best citizens to their deaths, and far more thousands of citizens of another country to their deaths, all while allegedly knowing full well that no one was going to find any WMDs?"

Ebert: Was the 2000 election stolen? Did Bush lie to get us into war? Did Bush violate the Constitution?

Yes.


"I have lost count of the Liberal Pundits who described Bush and Cheney as Murdering (Iraq), Racist (Katrina), Thieves (2000 & 2004 Elections)."

Ebert: Thieves for sure.


"Ebert: Thieves for sure.

I am sorry but that also is a lie perpetuated by the left. There are many lies on the left and right.
"

Ebert: Explain to me how and why Bush won the 2000 election.

"Who is into conspiracy theories now?"

Ebert: What is it about the 2000 election you don't understand?

"I wasn't that upset by the Bush protests, and after the left went there with hitler and whatever I SURE don't care about it with the current idiot president."

Ebert: An idiot? What word would you use for Bush?